De la rasarit si pana la apus -- Forever God is Faithful

goodbye again...

2007-07-09T12:02:00.000-07:00

ooo man...

i just got done saying goodbye to Doina and Costy.

the past three days have flown by and i can't believe that in 6 hrs i will be leaving for the airport.

we have spent most of our time the past days back at the park just spending time together, laughing a lot, talking a lot...

Saturday James flew in and we went to pick him up from the airport. then Saturday night there was a Christian concert at Costy's church that we all went to.

yesterday after church Viorica cooked lunch for Costy, Doina, James, Tony, Ionica, and I. it was so much fun being with Tony and Ionica again--even though we can't speak many words to each other--just like before somehow we manage to communicate.

thank you for your prayers so very much--the Lord is in control. He has calmed my heart over the past few days and given me moments with these dear girls that i will never forget.

I am sorry I can't write much more--I have to go try to get some sleep.

please pray for my flights tomorrow--i fly out of Romania at 6 am and almost 24 hrs and four planes later i will arrive in Dallas :) pray that none of the flights are delayed because then i mostly likely won't get home...well tomorrow at least.

my bags are packed along with about 10 crepes filled with finetti, 4 snidel(basically chicken fried steak romanian style), 4 pieces of cake bread, a whole circle of cheese...o dear...well at least i won't have to spend any money on food tomorrow :)

signing out of Romania again...maybe not for the last time--God only knows :)

much much love

He is worthy.

2007-07-07T02:36:00.000-07:00

"I love you, Lord, my strength

The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer,

My God, my rock, in whom I take refuge,

my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised,

and I am saved from my enemies."

Psalm 18: 1-2

well....

I am going to be honest. The past three days have been hard. full of lots of emotions...anger, sadness, frustration, lonliness...

I don't know why I am here.

but as my dear friend Juliette reminded me...I am here in Faith.

and according to scripture that means that i don't see what God is doing i might not ever know the answer to the question why...but I am called to trust him and have faith--

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. "Heb. 11:1

I don't know exactly how to explain everything that is going on...but I wanted to ask for your prayers. more than anything right now I want to be on a plane home...and i never thought i would type that.

so we went to the mountain: Costy, Doina, Ionica, Niki, and I and well. basically anything that could have gone wrong --did.

honestly...it was so hard for me to love. the last thing i wanted to do was be patient, self-less, kind, generous, joyful, etc. but even in the midst of all of this God is Faithful. Costy, Doina, and I had conversations and moments together that I will treasure forever and I pray that the Lord is working in their hearts and minds. I pray He is changing them, just like He is changing me.

i knew before coming that the only thing on my agenda was to love. period. love them. anyone i came in contact with. and so i want to ask you to pray for me to stop looking at Emily and what she is doing, but remember that Jesus has called us to BE. to Be love. to love Him and to love people.

here are some pics from the trip:

me and the driver Mr. Niki

costy and I on one of the smallest streets in all of Europe :)

yesterday the girls and I went to the store because I wanted to buy some things for the orphanage...and then we decided to go to the park/lake.

after sitting by the lake for a while we decided to rent a boat and go rowing :) I praise God for giving us Joy and laughter. I want you to know that even though I feel very attacked by the devil and many problems are facing me--God is faithful to allow my time with Costy and Doina to be full of love and conversations and questions and goodness :)

here are some pics and videos from the lake...enjoy!

the beauty of My Father...

rowing lesson #1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVOSLAdOP2I

rowing lesson #2

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cx039d2Md1A

rowing lesson #3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzkS59mP7qQ

last night i got to go to Friday night church with Costy, and it was so good. so refreshing to be with other believers praising God. and even though i am very lonely...He is near. He is all i need and is faithful to use His people and His word to comfort and strengthen me.

He is worthy to be praised. worthy for me to be uncomfortable. worthy for me to feel lonely. worthy for me to be selfless when that is the last thing i feel like doing. worthy for me to praise him even when i honestly don't feel Him at all at times.

He is worthy.

thank you for your prayers. i love you,

em

Joy :)

2007-07-03T11:42:00.000-07:00

romania is hot. very very hot.

maybe it was this hot in sevilla but i didn't realize it....i don't know if i remember being this hot in a long time...

sooo yesterday constanta and doina met me at around 11 in the morning and we headed to Santa Maria together. the feeling of being back there is unexplainable. the girls running up to me screaming my name--i honestly didn't think they would remember me... after i unattached them from my legs and arms Constanta decided it would be a good idea to have a bible study time together with the young girls--side note: if anyone knows of how to get children teaching materials in other languages(romanian) please let me know, i am searching the internet as well--but Costy desperately needs more materials

during the bible study i didn't really do much...can't really speak the language...:) so i just held them and tried my best not to distract the girls and make them listen to Costy. She is an amazing teacher! the girls look up to her so much and you can see how they run to her for everything.

afterwards Doina, Costy, and I headed to a park to meet up with the missionary team from California and a group from Costy's church to help pass out flyers about the concert on Saturday night. The team set up and performed their songs and dramas in the middle of the park...welllll until the police came and told us we had to leave...seems to be some law against loud music in the park or something--honestly they were more upset that we were promoting christianity than anything else

but I had a chance to meet so many people that night--Costy's church, "Mustard Seed", has a sort of foundation that is in a building connected to the church. this foundation serves as a sort of half-way house for orphans to live in between the time they leave the orphanage and get on their feet by themselves. it is through this foundation that the missionary team from Cali came. Teresa is a woman who we met during January--she has served here for almost two years...it was great talking with her again--hearing more of her stories and receiving advise from her. I also got to talk with a few other people from the group and from her church which was so encouraging!

I don't have much time so here are some pics from monday :) and a couple of videos...enjoy!

here are the links to the videos :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTrh2p-JIm0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pD8H825uYyQ

...and today i went to Pinnochio to see Tony and Ionica and play with all the kids!
Viorica and I bought lots and lots of soft pretzels on our way so we could give the kids. honestly the orphanage has gone from bad to worse...I took some pics but the director spotted me and i think because i was by myself she thought i was maybe with a newspaper or something...but anyways she took my camera away. I explained with her that i could delete the pictures and then I could have my camera back....so it all worked out but i wish i had my pictures. Viorica and I gathered some of the kids and went outside to their 'playground' which in america would be referred to as a dump yard...maybe not even that-- we gave the kids some jump ropes and coloring papers. Viorica read to them the story of creation in Genesis 1, while they colored pictures of trees and animals. i spent the next couple of hours playing hand clapping games and jump rope and teaching the kids songs!

then i saw a bus pull up and a mission team came and did skits and dramas! during this i got to snap a few pics with the kids :)

sooo here are some pics from today...

constanta and I walking home...:)

after pinnochio Costy, Doina, and I walked around the city for a while and then headed back to Viorica's for dinner.

today all the girls at Santa Maria left to go camping for a vacation sort of thing for a week and so Niki and Viorica decided that we would take a trip to see Dracula Castle and spend the night in the mountains! (maybe it will be cooler there) Costy, Doina, Ionica, and I are all going! I am so excited! mostly because i know they just need to get away from here, they need a break from their life for a few days.

ha and i asked Niki how long it takes to get there...possibly 8 hrs in a car....this is going to be very interesting...riding in a car in Romania with Niki and Ionica in the front for 8 hrs....say some prayers :)

His steadfast love.

2007-07-01T10:35:00.000-07:00

I will recount the steadfast love of the Lord, the praises of the Lord, according to all that the Lord has granted us, and the great goodness to the house of Israel that he has granted them according to the abundance of HIS steadfast love.
(Isaiah 63:7)

sometimes words don't possess meaning. or the right meaning. or enough meaning. i don't know but right now i have no clue what to write.

His love is overwhelming. it is uncomprehensible. i can't begin to describe it. His love.

never thought i would be writing on this blog again.

I arrived here in Romania at about 1a.m. this morning. Viorica and Niki were there to greet me with open arms! Viorica and I held hands the whole way to the car laughing and talking about what has happened in our lives since our last time together.

Jenn, its crazy how familiar it all looks. as we were driving so many memories were running through my head. it feels so normal for me to be here so natural--which i really hard to explain

sleep and food was basically all i could think about. the food problem was cured very quickly with a chicken sandwhich AND non other than our beloved fresh crepes and finetti :)

I got in bed around 3a.m.

at about 8:30 I woke up to Doina and Constanta knocking at my door and wrapping their arms around me....joy, excitement, peace, overwhelming love, compassion, happiness--does not begin to describe.

they told me i had about 10 minutes to get ready for church and so i threw on some clothes and we ate breakfast together and then hand in hand headed for the metro. it felt like nothing had changed. except the amount of love between the three of us. we only have to look into each other's eyes to know what the other is thinking.

we speak in three languages. my mind is so confused right now. i'm saying Hola! Cha faci! adios! how are you? Vale! cuplacere! gracias! Constanta and Doina have had to stop me while speaking spanish about 10 times today..because i forget that i dont' have to speak spanish here.

we got to the church a little late but as i entered i realized it was jam packed full of people. and the speaker was speaking in english! come to find out there is a team here from california on a mission trip. about 17 are staying here for two weeks working through/with Constanta's church. so the whole service was either translated into english or the speaker was speaking in english! ahhhmazing :)there were about 3 pastors from the states and they all had their turn to share/sing.

during the random spurts of praise as i was standing listening to the mix of english and romanian words fill the air--all bringing glory to God..i thought in my head..i could be home here.

its the same feeling i felt when i spent time at Emilio's house in Sevilla with 4 other believers until 4 in the morning singing praise songs in spanish....i could be home here

here in the midst of people who love Him. who have realized their depravity. their utter nothingness and have decided to become vulnerable and fall in love with the one who chose to pour His love on us. i feel at home.

church ended about 2pm :)

after church Constanta, Doina, and I started home. ahhhh there is no way for me to describe how refreshing how incredible it was to spend the day walking around the city with them. we went to Santa Maria first for a little while. i walked into the hall and Caitalina ran towards me shouting Emily!!!! we stayed there for a while just talking and hanging out with the girls...we walked a lot and took a lot of buses and finally about 5 pm got back to Viorica's.

we ate dinner together and decided what the plan is for the rest of the week.

this weekend the mission team and constanta's church is putting on a big concert Saturday night. so tomorrow night we are going to go with them to the park and help pass out flyers. wednesday i am going with Constanta with a foundation called "Children to love" to another orphanage, mostly all little kids, and we are going to spend the day there.

ahhhh

sometimes the bible comes alive to me.

and phrases like...
"many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand" (proverbs 19:21)

and

"my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord, For as the heavens are higher than the earth so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts."(Isaiah 55:9)

they are more than just words when they start to describe your life.

over the past couple of years of my life i feel like i have said a million times in my head or heart "who am I? and whose life am i living? is this reeeeally me?"

and as i was reading in matthew on the plane out of Italy early this morning...this thought was crossing my mind yet again.....and the words of Jesus suddenly resonated in my heart within a verse that i have heard my whole life and...it came alive to me.

"Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." (matt.10:39)

this isn't my life. this isn't me living. i honestly feel so out of the picture sometimes it scares me. as if i was living inside of someone else's body.

but now it makes sense. what Jesus said and what i've heard my whole life makes sense. and most people would say well yea thats not that hard to figure out. well it was for me. and it still is for me. but...it is in this weird feeling of not living that i feel the most alive.

irony at its best.

the moments when i feel like screaming "somebody pinch me!!" because i feel like its not really me doing the action or experiencing whatever it is i'm experiencing. i love those moments.

i am having to fully run on faith right now. rely fully on the Love of my God to pour out of me. and i love it because i don't feel alive....yet i feel like i'm actually living.

a;dlkjaowiefjaw;ejfawoeijfawokejfaowijfawejfawoi

a;sdlfjawoeijf

letters do not do justice. words can not even pretend to proclaim what is in my heart.

i love you all very much!

and i am glad to be back..eating crepes, listening to the bird chriping, and looking forward for tomorrow because i have no idea what it is going to bring...

jenn i miss you. wish you were here with me. everyone misses you very much

We are HOME!

2007-01-12T12:45:00.000-08:00

We are HOME! We made it home after an 11 hr plane ride last night around 9:30! We hugged and loved on our parents and then headed back to the Crouse house only to find ms. blaire and ms. juliette sitting in my living room!!!! What a precious surprise they were!

We were able to share stories, laugh and finally hit the sack at 2:00AM. Em and I had been up for well over 25 hours :).

Emily & her family just left and I had some time to upload pictures! I wanted to give you my yahoo photo website for you to enjoy. So far two albulms are of Romania - but I have a few more pictures to get.

http://new.photos.yahoo.com/jennyc579/albums/

Love you all. Thanks for all of your prayers. We got home and had already received emails from our precious romanian friends. God has been so good to us!

Keep checking the blog because we may update in the coming months!

Love,
Jenn

We're leaving on a jet plane...

2007-01-08T09:33:00.000-08:00

Hi! I just sat down to write one last time from this little wooden corner desk in the Duta apartment!

We are excited because tonight we have been able to hang out with Doina & Constansa - a trip to the "mall" for some last minute things, coffee and ice cream (2x) haha - we were able to buy some computer items for Doina (James you should be excited ;) ) - she didnt want a bag (well the one she sort of wanted was just like one she had) so we bought some blank CD's, headphones and a USB cord. Hope that is okay!

We also got manicures with Viorica today and Emily got her hair done. She looked beautiful! A great way to finish our trip! Mom - my nails are long! You will be impressed :).

We are hoping that Doina & Constansa will spend the night with us until 4 in the morning (when we head for the airport!)

Emily and I are feeling a little bit better (health wise) so we are praying it is a lot better tomorrow when we leave!

As most of you know, Emily and I head to Paris tomorrow for a day and a 1/2. We had a lay over there anyway and dad suggested that we just stay a day or so to "detox." Pray that Emily and I would be able to do just that. To gather our thoughts about this trip and to relax a little bit. On the plane we are hoping to put together a "chronological schedule" of all that happened here - so pray that we can remember all the little details :).

We are excited because we got the recipe for our favorite food here & we want to fix it for all of you when we recap our stories for you!

Thank you for your prayers, your tears, your love , the deep care you have poured onto us and for walking hand-in-hand with us through the trip! You have been used in mighty, mighty ways!

We love you! We will see you soon!
Jenn & Emily

2007-01-07T13:50:00.000-08:00

ahhh it is getting hard to think about leaving--not as much leaving as saying goodbye to the people we have a close relationship with

Yesterday after the pinochio experience we headed to Santa Maria to hang out with the girls :)

We played cards (we taught them 'go fish' and 'speed' ! ) and sang and danced~ The atmosphere at Santa Maria is very much like a summer camp feeling--all the girls run in and out of the rooms, they share clothes, etc.

Then we got a group of about 6 of the older girls and headed downtown to eat pizza together. Jenn and I made a notebook for each girl. Inside we wrote them a letter and put a printed out a 'Read your Bible in a Year' outline for them to follow. In Constanta's we put a sort of devotional about Beauty and what it means to be beautiful in the Lord's eyes for her to talk to all the girls about.

So after pizza we came back to the orphanage and went to Constanta and Doina's room. It actually ended up just being Jenn, Constanta, Doina, Andrea, and me in the room. I know that God was sovereign over the people who ended up staying for the sort of prayer and bible study time.

We gave them their notebooks, shared scripture together, and shared the gospel story again. At the end we held hands and prayed together. I couldn't stop the tears...I honestly don't know how to explain to you how I am feeling. These girls have changed my life forever--if we didn't come to impact them, they have for sure impacted Jenn and I.

crazy to think that we have only been here a little over a week--it feels like a year ago I left and came. God has done so much spiritually even though naturally speaking we haven't been here long at all.

This morning we went to church with Viorica, Nikki, Doina, Madalina, Ionica, Tony, Jenn, and I. (Jenn's random story that brought her joy: there was a guest speaker who gave the sermon and guess what? Though he spoke RO, he could not give an entire sermon with it - so he gave the sermon in english and there was a translator!!! Em and I were exhausted from only 4 hrs of sleep so listening to a 2 hr service in RO was quite the daunting task. As we both fought to keep our eyes open - i prayed that God would bring some english our way. Then - all of a sudden the man opened his mouth and emily and i bright eyed turned our heads and smiled! God is so good! I was actually able to stay awake then! haha. )

Afterwards we headed to McDonalds again. :)

I held hands with Ionica and Tony on the way to McDonalds--they had many conversations in Romanian with me in the middle not understanding any of it. However, every now and then Tony would look up at me and say, "Big Mac...Fanta...French Fries"--in that standard American voice. Just through those words we communicated! crazy huh--although I did find out that he doesn't like pepsi but he LOVES sprite and fanta! ...maybe my romanian is getting better!

After McDonalds Jenn and I wanted to go to pinocchio and give the two little brothers (we wrote about them yesterday) happy meals! The problem is that we were only with Ionica and Tony--both don't speak english--and we had never been there without Viorica and Nikki. Doina did not want to come with us, in all honesty she was too scared to go. Like I said before this place is an animal house. Regardless, Jenn and I decided to pray and go! I knew that Jesus was protecting us and His angels were around us.

So after riding a few buses we finally arrived at Pinocchio. As we were walking on the street by the entrance a few 10 yr old boys came out of the gate. Jenn was holding Tony's hand and the boys began to kick and punch Tony. Right there before our eyes we saw what happens probably more than once a day to the kids who live there. One of the boys got a pretty good punch in--Tony's face turned bright red and he started crying. It was a very surreal scene--I mean Jenn was holding his hand and this happened. I can't imagine what happens behind closed doors.

Needless to say this did not help calm our nerves...
We entered the orphanage, praying to get passed the guards without talking (since you know, we don't speak RO).
We did--we just walked right in. We ran up the stairs looking for our two friends from the day before. We found them and then led them to their room, trying to not let anyone notice us. We hid the happy meals in our jackets because if the other kids saw them there was a chance that they would either beat up the two brothers or come after Jenn and I.
...I can't really call their room a bedroom... there was a couch that looked as if two giant dogs had torn it apart...there was trash all over the place...the door was broken off of the hidges...

So we pulled out the food and gave it to them! ahh the relief of finally getting it in there hands!
I really wanted to stay and watch them eat it so that I knew that the other kids would not have taken it, but Jenn and I decided to leave as quickly and quietly as possible. I prayed that even if they didn't get to eat the food, that God would simply use the fact that Jenn and I came to give it to them, to hug them, to kiss them--and that through that they might know they are loved and cared for.

So here we are typing on the computer--so don't worry we are alive ;)

Tonight we went to Constanta's church again--it is very encouraging to go into a church and from the first moment feel at home though we were thousands of miles away. The people there loved us incredibly even though some of them didn't know our language. I believe the Lord provided this community of believers as a constant source of the body of Christ during our time here in Romania.

After church it was just Constanta, Doina, Jenn, and I. I was thankful the Lord allowed us to spend this last night in Romania together with the girls who we are the closest to. We went to McDonalds (yes 2 times in one day...). ahhh I am so thankful--the Lord blesses our time together so obviously!

So tomorrow we are packing up--going to buy a few more things for the girls--and tomorrow night we head to Santa Maria to say goodbye.

Please pray for us. Tommorrow is going to be hard. I dont want you to think that we are ready to pack up our bags and move here (although I have had that thought a few times). It is just the Lord has blessed our time with these people so significantly--and we are sad to leave them.

Also pray because Jenn and I are getting sick. symptoms: cough, really sore throat, achy body, achy joints, and really just physically exhausted. We are getting a chance to sleep in tomorrow--Praise the Lord! He knew we needed it! pray that even though we are feeling awful that we are still able to encourage the girls and fully communicate with them the things the Lord has laid on our hearts.

I love you very much--thanks mom and dad for calling me tonight--it was an answered prayer :)

thank you for your prayers!

2007-01-06T14:11:00.000-08:00

pray for Jenn and I--today was a hard day

I wish I had time to tell you the whole story...even if we did it still wouldn't explain

We gave away the gifts at Pinochio this morning. I think we have already explained to you the animal like atmostsphere of this particular orphanage. Before we even left the building the older boys(17&18 yr olds) had already taken the little boys toys away and some of the girls perfumes--i guess to sell for money.

After giving the gifts away I noticed a little boy much smaller than the rest of the children I had seen. He was standing along side his older 12 yr old brother... long story short...we found out later that they had only been there for two days...the police found them in a train station alone. Jenn and I spent about 15 minutes holding them and sobbing over them as the older boys surrounded us and laughed at us...i tried so hard to not cry but it was impossible.

As the little boy was being ripped off me, we headed out the door and cried, leaning on viorica for strength.

So. pray for us. we have soft hearts and need our Savior to strengthen them & comfort them.

Little Tidbits that brightened our day ....

1) Earlier in the day we got into a taxi cab only to hear "Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance, I just wanna praise Him, I just wanna Praise Him... " blasting through the speakers.

2) One of the boys @ the orphanage was wearing a pine cove T-shirt. And not only was it PC - it was an A&M pine cove shirt with a big WHOOP on the back!!!!!

3)Watching Alina fold & refold her new shirt, shorts, underwear & socks while singing Book-a-waka

A cold day in the park!

2007-01-05T07:06:00.000-08:00

It has been a great day so far! We took the little girls to what I can only compare to a carnival like park (the ones that come in town randomly). They jumped, played, ate chips & coke - it was great! The little ones do not get to go out very much so they were all giddy!

Climbing over this bridge - it was quite the obstacle.

Our precious friends - Doina, Me, Emily, Constansa.

Too cute!

Yay for chips and fun rides!!

Alina is cute but whew! you should see her when she is angry!!

Jumping! Jumping! Jumping!

Two girls enjoying the "carnival ride."

I cannot believe that three days from now we will be headed home. Time has flown by here! Just today, on the way home, Emily & I were dreaming about future possibilities here & all over the world. Emily was talking to me about how insane it is that God uses us just being here to change lives. We aren't doing anything - we are just living two weeks in RO and loving these girls. It's crazy how He uses that!

It will be very hard to leave on Tuesday morning. These girls are dying to be loved. That's all they need. I so wish I could move here for six months or a year and just love them. A few girls have mentioned that they don't like to get close to "girls like us" because they know we will just leave anyway. But praise God they have opened up!!

Last night was providential. God used ice skating to bring the older girls not only close to Emily & I but also close to each other. They said they had never really been out of the orphanage together before! I delighted in the Lord as I saw them laugh with each other and want to skate with each other!!! I pray for community there. Constansa is being used in incredible ways- and I praise God for the encouragement Emily has brought her - but I so desire in my heart to see her have community with other girls that know Jesus.

Well. I guess I must go! Time to go shopping for the kids at Pinocchio! We get to deliver the gifts tomorrow! I am excited to give the kids all of the hand knitted items that we brought!

With much love,

Jenn

2007-01-04T13:05:00.000-08:00

it snowed yesterday!!!

we want to extend a special thanks to all who gave to this trip--we cannot wait to share with you the stories about how your money was used!

yesterday we took Constanta and Doina shopping :)

yesterday we bought a new bed for Nikki and Viorica! Their old one was over 30 years old!

Tonight we took 6 of the older girls to McDonalds and ice skating in downtown! It was incredible to see how God used this gesture to soften the girls hearts and build community among us.

God is MOVING!! He is guiding us in even the smallest ways (many stories to come!)

pray for salvation--pray that God would give us the words to say when sharing the gospel with these precious girls--We are learning even more that Jesus' name is very powerful (many stories to come!)

ps--for more information on our wreck with a car full of gypsies see James' blog

http://takingtheliberty.blogspot.com

we love you,
jenn and emily

sorry this is a very long post...

2007-01-02T15:03:00.000-08:00

nothing is better than sitting in Viorica’s kitchen listening to Frank Sinatra, watching the lovebirds interact (aka-Viorica and Nikki), eating fresh bread with turkey and butter while drinking homemade wine out of a fanta bottle…

we honestly could make this trip into a movie!

but I ‘sacrifice’ (Romanian inside joke) and come to computer to write blog. haha do you hear how my English is getting worse and worse—I apologize, if I haven’t before, about my poor grammar.

We have only been here for four days...four days is such a short time but after only the first day it felt like I had been a part of this life for at least a month or more.

I agree with Jenn—I have an array of emotions running through my body it is hard to explain what or how I am really feeling. And posting on this blog has become hard and frustrating because there is so much to say and these words do not suffice. I want to be able to explain to you all that we have done, what we learned, what we felt…but its impossible. When I get home, get ready for many stories, probably along with many tears.

So here is my attempt at an acceptable update…
I honestly have some time, so this might be a long one it is a summarizes Sunday, Monday, and Tues!

On Sunday (New Years Eve) and we had the privilege of attending church with Viorica and Nikki. James, Jenn, Viorica, and I all took a taxi to church while Nikki went around to the orphanages to pick up some kids. Constanta and Doina met us at the church.

Walking in their church was just like walking in a traditional American Baptist Church. Actually everything here is a lot like America. I mean this seems so obvious to say—but the only real difference is they speak a different language. From my experiences the life in South American countries is quite different from my life in Texas—but here it feels the same. (well as much as ‘same’ can be…if that makes sense) Although we didn’t understand what the preacher was saying, the style and routine of the church was the same. Even though we didn’t understand the language and we didn’t have a translator, it was powerful to see how the spirit of God united us.

After church we went to Mic Donalds (as they say in Romania). Jenn, James, Constanta, Doina, Tony(10yr old boy from Pinocchio), Ionica( about 15 yr old boy from Pinochhio), and I all walked together to eat! Another boy did come to church with us who is also named Ionica (if you went to James blog—he is the one who is in need of foot surgery). However, this Ionica was late getting ready for church and so he wasn’t allowed to come to eat with us. Viorica and Nikki are amazing teachers, they love the children with such intensity and passion. In order to actually love them they see the need for discipline, and the children respect them and try to become better because of this discipline. It is amazing to watch in action.

Walking hand in hand to McDonalds with Tony warmed my heart. Although I could not understand when he would try to speak to me, I smiled with him-laughed with him-hugged him-squeezed him-and we connected 

During this McDonalds experience Tony stole my heart and has since become a very dear boy to Jenn and I. I wish I could take him back home with me. He was such a gentleman. He cleaned up our table and threw away all our trash. I noticed that Tony didn’t have a jacket(as Jenn mentioned in her blog), and remembered that Doina let him use her gloves as we walked. I asked him if he had a jacket (with the help of Doina translating). He did not. I asked him if he would like one, and if so what color and size. There is a big problem with stealing at Pinocchio and the little kids are sometime beat up by the older ones. Tony’s knuckles were stratched and really red. So I told Jenn and James and we decided to find the closest store and buy him a jacket right then!

Jenn and Emily’s new motto has become, “You need, we get!”

Oh and before leaving McDonalds the Lord placed two more boys in our pathway that were in need. Jenn said as she was throwing away her half empty drink a little boy said he wanted it. He was with a friend and they were eating some French fries together. We asked them if they would like a hamburger and their own drink. Constanta stayed and talked with them and talked to them about Jesus while we went and ordered their food. We added two strawberry Mcflurries  Constanta invited them to come to her church too!

This trip has taught me a lot about giving and being intentional with my giving. It is amazing to think about how the holy spirit convicted me throughout this past semester about this. The Lord revealed many things to me in this area. Now I am able to attempt to put it into action Regardless of what it is, my time, my love, my money, conversations with people, or anything at all—the Lord is teaching me more about being a servant and more about letting go…
Canstanta and I have become very close. You know how sometimes when you meet someone, the second you meet them you know that somehow you were meant for each other. Pray for our relationship—the Lord is working in amazing ways! But while I am talking about giving I wanted to share with you a little about Constanta. Every time I ask her where she got something (ex: shirt, shoes, bedspread, book, etc) she responds, “someone gave it”. Now it has become funny to us because I keep asking her where she has gotten things in a sort of humorous exasperated manner she replies, “Eeeemmm-uuhhh-leeee someone gave it!!” She has friends from all over the world because they have come to the orphanage to serve. One woman came with a group called ‘Children to Love’. She stayed for a year I think. This woman will never fully know the impact she has made on Constanta’s life. It is encouraging to hear and see. The saying is true, ‘ To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.’ Never think that anything you do is in vain, and never grow weary of doing good. Galations 6:9, “So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up”. Sending small packages full of things as simple as shampoo and toothbrushes makes an overwhelming impact. Constanta mentions this woman at least once a day, speaking of things she gave her or things she learned from her. Even people from churches who send her things in the mail that don’t even know her—she remembers. It is crazy to see how the Lord has provided for her. She and I were talking last night. She told me that even before she knew God she prayed for friends to come.
She said even though she didn’t know Him--He knew her and heard her prayer. Wow.

New Year’s eve night I also had a chance to talk with a 24 yr old young man named Ionutz. He has never been to America but he said that he met a few Americans in Italy. He told me that they were so surprised to see how happy he was yet he didn’t really have that much. They had a lot, but were not happy or satisfied at all.
Ionutz loves Jesus and is a solid believer. We had a chance to talk about how we don’t find our joy in anything else but serving Jesus. This really isn’t fresh news or an inlightening story. I’ve heard things like this a million times it is still something to ponder. Please don’t take this story as a guilt trip for our American materialism, but as a challenge as believers. Materialism is so hard to fight, even here I can feel its pull on the inside of me. Pray for me. Pray that I will continue to fight this spirit of greed and materialism that seems so much harder for us as Americans. Pray that I will not grow apathetic towards fighting it.

…So after McDonalds we headed down the street to find a store to buy Tony a jacket. When we got there the store was closed. So we told him we would come to Pinocchio on Monday to see him and give him the jacket…

At about 7pm we headed to the middle of Bucharest to the New Years Celebration! James, Jenn, Constanta and I went together. The city was full of excitement. Romania joined the EU as of January 1, 2007 so the people of Bucharest were gathered together to celebrate this new life for Romania.

We stayed there for about two hours enjoying the live concert. Then we headed to Constanta’s church for their New Year Celebration.

I cannot begin to describe the feeling I had after being in the church only a few minutes. The spirit was very powerful. It was a very small church with about 50 people in attendance. The Lord provided an amazing translator, named Christian, for Jenn and I during the service. He was only 20yrs old but was the best Romanian English speaker we had met so far. It was a breath of fresh air for me to talk to someone and they honestly understand every thing I said. Dad--their pastor reminded me so much of you! He was full of energy and excitement—he never stopped dancing or singing to the top of his lungs! He stayed up the entire night with everyone—throughout the night he would get on the stage and start singing with his whole heart! They told us that he would never stop, he just keeps singing and praising God until someone makes him stop! Mom, the pastor’s wife got up and spoke for a while and even though she was speaking Romanian I have not doubt that you and her were cut from the same cloth! She was preaching about a Tommy Tinny book she had read recently—and just like you she always got the last word ;)
Their praise and worship was overwhelming! Most of the songs Jenn and I knew—they had translated Hillsongs and other contempory American praise and worship bands. While they shouted and praised God in Romanian there Jenn and I were shouting in English! We danced and danced and danced! My heart was so full of joy as Constanta stood beside me dancing and singing! At midnight exactly we took the Lord’s supper together. What an amazing way to start off the new year. I was so touched by the passion and intensity of the pastor and his family. He has 8 children and most of his sons made up the praise and worship team. After communion we sang and danced some more! Jenn and I stayed up all night talking to the kids there who were all mostly our age or a few years older. Lots of stories to share from this night!

Needless to say Jenn and I walked in the door of Viorica’s house at about 8a.m. the next morning! We never slept!

We started finishing packaging the gifts for Santa Maria. Afterwards, we found out that we would not be able to go give the gifts until later that night—so Jenn and I got to sleep from about 11a.m. to 5p.m.

There is not a way for me to express to you that night as we gave away the gifts…I cannot wait to share pictures with everyone!

This morning (tues) we woke up and went to buy the jacket for Tony and some other gifts for children that we have been around a lot and have realized what they need and want.

Pray for me—it is very hard to see Tony and not burst into tears. However, Jenn and I crying in our beds at night won’t help his situation at all…pray for us to have strength and peace even though all we see is darkness around us.

Then we headed to Santa Maria to spend time with Doina and Constanta. On the way we had a car wreck. We ran into the side of a car that didn’t yield. Don’t worry no one was hurt and everything is ok. I only tell you this so that you can know to pray. Pray for Nikki and that everything with the insurance will work out. Nikki has a very strong character—even in the midst of crisis he stood strong and did not overreact. I pray for the Lord’s favor as he works everything out with the police. I praise God for protecting us!

Satan is throwing darts, as you say Andrei. Pray for us—God is bigger!

God provided a man at the scene who was nice enough to walk Jenn and I to Santa Maria so that we could get to the girls. What Satan had planned for bad, God turned into good and we were able to praise Him through it all!

Jenn and I had the amazing opportunity to wrap our arms around Viorica later in the night at the orphanage and pray over her as she held onto us and leaned on our shoulders. Thank you Lord for using us in that situation! It was another moment I will never forget…

We spent the evening with the girls there as James worked on the computers. He was able to install anti-virus programs.

At about 10pm we left the orphanage hand in hand with Doina, Isabella(her twin sister), and Constanta—they walked us to the highway to get a taxi. As we walked we sang “Open the eyes of my heart Lord” and “I will give you all my worship…”

Ahhhh there is too much and this is already too long!!! After reading it over again, it doesn’t even begin to encompass all that I want you to know and feel.

We have less than a week left…pray that I God will give me wisdom and discernment. I need help knowing what to be intentional about while spending time with Constanta and Doina. I need prayer because now even when I see them my eyes fill with tears—I don’t want to cry around them. I mean I know I will when I leave—but now I don’t think I could clearly explain to them what is going on in my heart.

Tomorrow we are taking Constanta on a shopping trip--pray for our time together with her and Doina. We want the gospel to be shared always.

Pray for Jenn and I that we would not believe the lies Satan tells us at times…Pray that we would continue to want to please God and not man!

I love you. You are each such a blessing to us—when we check our blog and see that we have comments it makes us so excited! I feel like I can hear your voices talking to us!

Thank you,
Emily

2007-01-01T16:23:00.000-08:00

so this is probably the most hilarious thing ever.

meet Alina. my new best friend :)

there is no commentary needed.

prepare yourself.

you are about to experience something that can only be explained as bookawaka.

oh and after this video,this young beautiful and energetic girl tackled me to the ground and 'styled' my hair...pictures to come soon :)

love you all very much--
emily :)

Jenn's post for 1/1/07

2007-01-01T13:36:00.000-08:00

We've made a little change. For blogging purposes - Emily & I are going to enter 2 entries a day - one mine and one hers - sometimes it is hard to write together because we both have different thoughts.

Here we are - still alive :). Isn't it beautiful?!

Ionica and Jenn - hehe Ionica does not know ANY english haha but we still communicate some how. its funny. he laughs with us :)

Diona and Emily - Diona is one of the girls we have gotten very close to. She is a sweetheart.

The two cutest, most in love couple that Emily & I adore. Mom Viorica & Dad Nikki.

Emily, Castansa, Jenn, Nikki - at church!

Emily & Toni -
pray for toni. he is precious. we love him. he often gets thigns stolen from the bigger guys at the orphanage. him and emily were talking and he said he didnt have a jacket - so we get to buy him one tomorrow. he works so hard and emily & i are so excited Jesus showed us this opportunity. pray no one would take it from him. pray that we would get to encourage him and love him. he is precious to us.

Jenn & Toni - we all went to McDonalds after church!

wow. Words cannot explain how i feel right now. I'm overwhelmed. I'm saddened. I'm so happy. I'm confused (with language barrier). I understand. I'm frustrated. I'm peaceful. I feel at home. I feel far away. Its strange.

God is so good. I feel as though now, day four ( i think), He translates in my heart the words that people are saying. I dont feel weird around Romanian anymore becuase i havent heard anything BUT that for four days. However, its weird - sometimes (often times today actually) I just "knew" what they were saying. Granted I have context and watch nonverbals - but its just so neat that God is bigger than language barriers.

I wanted to ask for prayer though.

Today we got to deliver our first stash of presents. Romanians do not show happiness on their face in the same way "americans" do - but as they were opening their presents; nikki said "ohh they are so happy." thank you to all who donated crayons, books, knitted items, money, and more. they LOVED it. its crazy to me that when asked what is the one thing you want if you can have anything - kids would say "underwear" "toothbrush" "shampoo." wow. we are so blessed in america.

Speaking of faces - its funny. Emily & I always ask the kids"can you tell we are american????" they always say "da! da!" (yes! yes!) haha. HOWEVER, i will say last night emily passed for a romanian!!! but - Constansa & Viorica both told us it is becasue of our countenance. we smile. we have a natural smile on our face even when we are 'plain faced.' people here (i am not making fun or saying this is bad - just factually saying) that they all look sort of sad - like you can stare right at the wall in their eyes. BUT. its neat because when i see brothers & sisters in Christ - i can tell. they smile and their eyes have light!

I feel like my favorite moment from yesterday was when we asked a kid "do you know starbucks" and the face i got back was hilarious. she said "starbucks - what means starbucks?" i told a guy to buy stock in starbucks if he ever hears about it :).

its incredible here. point being. its hard and time is running out. i never thought 2 weeks would seem so short. i cant imagine leaving. my eyes fill up with tears everytime i think about the plane ride home. i dont want to leave these kids. nor nikki & viorica.

pray. pray that we would be filled with purpose. pray as each day passes that God would utilize our individual abilities. pray Jesus would show Emily & I directly where we individually fit here. pray that the gospel would ring LOUD and these key orphans would be big players for years to come. that we could encourage them to take heart, be strong and remember God overcame the world! we tell them often of the many christians in college station and in "the states." pray that emily & i would get time in the Word too. that we would make time for it.

keep checking james' blog & picasaweb for photos!

thank you to everyone who comments. it encourages us so much! we really do look forward to checking our blog each morning. blaire - meg => I will introduce yall in the spring. You two need to know each other outside of the cyberspace community :).

oh one last prayer request. beeler here i go with the crazy requests ;) - pray for my camera. i use batteries but they die really quickly. like crazy quickly. its weird. pray they would last longer and my camera wouldnt go psycho on me :). thanks!

Pictures 12/31

2006-12-31T06:12:00.000-08:00

Here are a few pictures all mixed together from the trip so far (we apologize for sideways-ness but we cant turn them) - for you to enjoy :). There will probably be more on James before today is over! Today has been a very good day. I feel as though they get better and better as each day passes! God is good! Every day we think "it cant get any better than this" but sure enough - it does! Many stories to tell from today but no time. We will update in 2007!!!!

Emily's music debut. Her album will be out in the spring. Watch for it! Music video to come the end of january ;0)

Cutest girl i have seen. she LOVED the camera!

James & Doina - he was a fan of being pushed around.

emily & i went to a romanian church today - we borrowed some of viorica's clothing. needless to say - it was hilarious.

Emily, Jenn, James
we make quite the trio! You should see the quote board we are developing!

Here is Emily & Constansa talking about their favorite verses!

Mr. Randy - this one is for you ;) you want a cup of this?

some kids at pinochio!

... emily & i during the attack ;0) we loved it.

we were making christmas cards!

Thank you for checking on us! Pray that we would have the Gospel on our lips all the time!

Dec 30th 2006

2006-12-30T12:13:00.000-08:00

on the last blog we started to share about our experiences from each orphanage...this is a sort of continuation...

Yesterday we got a chance to travel to all four orphanages, mostly because James needed to check the computer situation with each.

Here are the names of all the orphanages...

Iomc 'Institution for protection mother and child' is the name of the baby orphanage here. (these are where we took the pictures from a couple of blogs ago) --it was very emotional to be there, our hearts filled with joy and sadness...but there is not a word to explain the feeling we felt while holding those precious babies...

Bradut is the smaller orphanage with mostly handicapped children, about 12 in all. As we stepped one foot in the door the kids attacked! :) We loved having the chance to spin them around and give them many hugs!! I hope we will get to go back and spend more time there--simply showing them attention and love-- that they are cherished.

http://takingtheliberty.blogspot.com/
(James' blog has more info on this orphanage--go read--especially the story of Ionica)

Pinnochio is another orphanage that is filled with adolescent children, boys and girls. It was a very exciting place, full of energy! The kids there knew some english and memorized our names within minutes! We met a group from Italy there who comes a few times a year to spend time with the children and help with what they can. It was encouraging to see how the Lord is sending many to Romania.

Santa Maria was the last orphanage we stopped at. It is an all girls orphanage. It was not nearly as crazy as Pinnochio (no boys-makes big difference! haha) We had the privledge of meeting a few of the older girls--Donia, Isabella, and Constansa(sp?). Donia and Isabella are twins--they speak fluent english and Constanta speaks english pretty well. We really hit it off! I have no doubt in my mind that they are God appointed friendships. They showed us their rooms--it reminded me of church camp. About 5 beds in a pretty good size room. The girls are incredible. Isabella and Donia love to sing! We had a concert right in the middle of the hallway :) Doina has a mp3 player and headset--she wanted us to sing before they would. Well lets just say after hearing me belt out Shania Twain they believed me when I said "I can't sing!" But, they can sing beautifully!--they love and know the popular American songs more than me!

We have more information about each orphanage and stories from each to tell when we get home.

---

Today (Dec 30th...it is actually midnight aka 0:00 in Romania--they are on a 24 hr clock)

there is so much to say about today--it has only been two days and with the amount of things that have already happened it feels like it has been a week!

After breakfast Doina and Constanta came over. We worked on getting all the names of the children matched with the Christmas cards they have received so far and read what each child wanted for Christmas.

We wrote over 70 Christmas cards :) Constanta began teaching us some Romanian!

Viorica, Doina, Constanta, Jenn, and I all headed off to the store to buy presents! As we walked to the store Constansa told us of how she came to know God and love Jesus. It brought tears to my eyes and is a moment I will never forget...
Doina and Constanta were such blessings--they helped translate and picked out what the children would like. The store was almost exactly like Sams. I enjoyed the time getting to know the girls better and goofing around :)

Afterwards all the girls headed back to the house while Nikki and James went to computer land store to look for supplies. We made the packages for the children, full of gifts and cards!

Tonight I cannot begin to explain...

We sat in the living room putting gifts together and singing "Shout to the Lord", "Blessed be the Name of the Lord"! Constanta in romanian and Jenn and I in english--but the unity of the spirit was overwhelming.
We sang and danced! (jenn and I have many many videos from tonight--i can't wait to share)

Constanta shared with me her favorite verse. Revelation 21:1-4 "Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning nor crying nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away. And he who was seated on the throne said, "Behold, I am making all things new."

she says it gives her hope.

this is her second favorite, Isaiah 61:1-3 "The spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all who mourn."

she says this is what she is called to do at Santa Maria (her orphanage).

Go to this website
http://www.childrentolove.com/
if you scroll down click on 'interview with constanta'--it is powerful

I praise God for the friendships that are forming here. They have encouraged me so much and I pray Jenn and I can be an encouragement to them.

this pretty much sums up today...

"Dumnezeu e taria mea
Adapost pentru sufpetup meu
ajutor cand povara e grea
Dumnezeu le taria mea"

translation: "Our God is an Awesome God He reigns from heaven above with wisdom, power, and love--Our God is an Awesome God!"

God Bless,
Jenn and Emily

ps: for Andrei and anyone else who speaks Romanian we apologize for misspelled words and the lack of accent marks--we are just learning :)

Crazy day!

2006-12-30T02:19:00.000-08:00

Jenn here - had a second and wanted to post a link to James' blog so you could read his take and see his pictures too!

Short update - yesterday after we posted - we went to ALL of the other orphanages! Pictures and stories from today to come soon when we have more time!

Yesterday we went to one orphanage, walked in and the kids went CRAZY haha. Emily & I were swinging them around and sweating like crazy! We are sore today!!!!!! haha.

oh but i did get a shower :)!!!!

Last night we also went out for pizza! Would you believe a coke costs 4$ here!!!!! Needless to say no coke for us!

Though are english is getting worse by the day - our romanian is getting better! We are learning lots of small words!

Well that is all for now. We are about to go shopping for Christmas presents that the kids requested. Pray it all works out. Emily & I are learning a LOT about communication. It's fun ;).

also. be thankful. take a second today and thank God for the small things. i know you hear all the time "you dont know what you guys have in america" but its true. crazy things you dont think about. be so so very thankful.

http://takingtheliberty.blogspot.com/

(this link is to james pictures)
http://picasaweb.google.com/williams.james

babies...ahhhh babies :)

2006-12-29T04:07:00.000-08:00

Well we have a few minutes to update...

Last night we arrived here at 10:35 pm. Viorica and Nikki were waiting for us with a sign! :) we prayed they would have a sign because we were afraid we would not recognize them.

It took us a while to fit everything in their tiny car...we had lots and lots of bags...but it all fit!

Once we got to their house we unloaded everything. They live on the 3rd floor so that was quite a workout....and i have to admit Viorica is a beast! She was kicking our rear hauling the luggage up!

Once we started unloaded we smelt food...lots and lots of food...

At about 11:30 we had our first home cooked meal in Romania.
Viorica cooked cabbage soup with meatballs, fried chicken, fried pork, cheese(lots-they like cheese) and bread.

We stayed up talking to Nikki and Viorica and James till 2:30 a.m.! Although we were both about to pass out, it was so much fun! (Dad Crouse - Nikki reminds me of Grandpa - he has the same funny, yet quiet sense of humor!!! its so fun to be around him).

We have already fallen in love with this couple. They are absolutely hilarious...we will have many stories about them!

ok sorry to cut short we are headed to the bank...update in a few hrs about the babies we held this morning :)

okay. back from the bank!
So. this morning. Viorica asked us to be up and ready at 9 for breakfast. Emily was smart and showered last night. Jenn, however, did not. I woke up this morning only to look @ the clock and see "9:25". EMILY! i screamed! we are late! Emily goes "ohhh we needed to be humbled from the begining Jenn!"

Anyway, because RO time is so 'whatever' we made it to the table right in time - though I got no shower :).

Then we went to the first orphanage and played with babies all morning!!! Thankfully, only one out of the 9 didnt like us :). haha. We played and swung around and squeezed them as tight as our arms would let us! These words really do not explain our hearts though - we cant wait to show pictures and tell you stories of what we have experienced - and it hasnt even been 24 hrs!

pray that God would show us specific ways to serve viorica and nikki and give them hearts to receive it.

we love yall!

We made it !

2006-12-28T13:41:00.000-08:00

Thank you all for your prayers. We had no trouble whatsoever with our travels.

We will update soon--there is already much to do!!!

--Jenn and Emily (in Romania!!!)

24 hours & counting .....

2006-12-26T20:46:00.000-08:00

We are at a loss of words as we sit in the computer room in Sugar Land, Texas and ponder the days before us .....

okay. for real. after packing, repacking and packing again. oh - and weighing in our hallway with a scale, as emily's dad and jenn's mom master the bags with tape measures - we are packed. and ready. finally.

there's not much more we can say. however we look forward to friday when we can post all about the first of many experiences .... the flight there!

Pray that we will get to witness to our fellow passengers of what God has been doing in our lives and share with them the love that has been lavished upon us - and how God is moving in RO!

Random business: please feel free to comment on our blog. We would love to hear from any of you who are reading our blog. All you have to do is press the comment button and enter in your message! You don't have to be a 'blog member.'

We hope all of you had a great Christmas and we can't wait to "type to you" again!!!! We'll let you know when we get there and have access to a computer!

Bags Are Packed!

2006-12-21T11:13:00.000-08:00

Well. My bags are packed. After about fifteen "packings" and "unpackings" I think it all fits.

Praise God that of all that luggage - only 1/2 of one bag is mine! The other 3 1/2 bags are all to give away!!! I can't believe how many presents Emily & I have been blessed with to take.

The top picture is of just a few knitted items that the Threads of Love Knitting Club from A&M - have sent with us! How incredible they are to have been knitting all semester long for this specific purpose - before any of us knew Emily & I would be going!! God is so sovereign!

Five days. Pray for us! Pray that in these five days Emily & I would not neglect the Word. Pray that we would be supernaturally filled up with His love.

Pray that in these next five days God would grant peace in the hearts of our parents. Pray that He would give them comfort in knowing He has called us to RO and He will keep us safe.

Thank you! Thank you for reading this and being a part of this! Thank you for caring about and loving Emily & I.

Five days! Ekk!

Signing out in Sugar Land one last time!

Jenn

(this is about how I feel right now)

love

2006-12-20T09:02:00.000-08:00

“Jesus promises a life in which we increasingly have to stretch our hands and be lead into places where we would rather not go.”
--Henre Nouwen, In the Name of Jesus

I received a DVD from a fellow missionary about Romania. This group ministers in a different part of Romania than we will be going and they mainly minister to the children’s Hospital.

I struggled watching the video. The pictures that I saw were similar to those we have all seen on TV. However, seeing those pictures flash before my eyes stuck a different cord with me….those are a picture of the precious Romanian children I am going to see in less than 7 days.

The orphanages we are going to have been described to us as ‘survival of the fittest.’ I honestly don’t know what to expect to see or hear or touch, but I know that it will be a life I have never seen firsthand before.

Jenn and I are both extremely excited about going to Romania—honestly we are both about to jump out of our skin. But at the same time I know that this is a place where I would ‘rather not go’. I would rather not see children hungry, homeless, without family, angry, sick, and scared from this world…but we ARE going to see this. I can’t wrap my mind around that right now but ask us when we get back and I’m sure we will have been enlightened…

My prayer is that the Lord will give us strength and most of all will shower us so much with his love that it will pour out of us onto the workers and the children. I am asking the Lord to strip away the preconceived thoughts and ideas I have---I want to stretch out my hand, I want to love sincerely.

For the past three days this scripture has been echoing over and over again in my head…

“Go and learn what this means: I desire mercy that is, readiness to help those in trouble and not sacrifice and sacrificial victims. For I came not to call and invite to repentance the righteous those who are upright and in right standing with God, but sinners the erring ones and all those not free from sin.”

I honestly don’t think I know what this means. But I pray God reveals it to me. And I desire to ‘go and learn’ what it means. I feel like this Romania trip is a step to my learning…

I want to be full of mercy, full of compassion.

That is our prayer, to not think like our carnal minds tend to, but to act in the spirit—letting the love of God infiltrate us and thus respond and act differently.

Thank you for your prayers!

New Man On Board!

2006-12-15T14:09:00.000-08:00

We've added five posts today ... why not make it six :)

We have exciting news! We found out yesterday that James, a man who works with GOOGLE corp & has previously traveled to RO, is joining us on our venture! He will overlap our stay for a few days. He has a friend that is donating 10 laptops for the orphanages! James will hit up the technological side of everything and provide the kids with google talk! A while back this was a desire of our heart - but we sort of tucked it away knowing God would do what He wanted in due time.

And now... twelve days before our trip - we have another passenger who bears great gifts!!!

I also went to Wal-Mart today and was able to purchase lots of toothpaste, toothbrushes, lice shampoo, combs and regular shampoo.

This might seem dumb - but as I was packaging the items I thought of it - please pray that during the flight none of our liquids burst. Pray that the shampoo, toothpaste, lotion etc would arrive just as it is right now. May seem irrelevant but we don't want lice shampoo soaking up our suitecase :).

you are too high...

2006-12-15T13:47:00.000-08:00

Jenn and I are done with finals...:)

and my heart is about to burst with excitement about Romania. Every morning when I wake up I stand in awe of how our God has orchestrated this outrageous opportunity before us. I had lunch with a dear friend a few days ago and after talking with her and sharing with her how this trip came about and all the crazy things God has taught me, blessed me, and shown me---i was overwhelmed with the love of our Father...

Our "romanian" story is a hard one to explain. Sometimes when I sit down with people and talk with them about it I honestly don't have the words to describe or somehow relay to them what the trip is all about. I suppose it is because Jenn and I honestly don't know…

It sounds crazy...doesn't really make sense...I mean I tell people about our trip to Romania over Christmas break and sometimes I just want to settle for simply telling them that..."we are going to Romania for two weeks to visit orphanages and pass out presents"---but that does not suffice.

No, that does not even touch the surface of what the Lord is doing. However, I can’t explain all that he is doing. I know, I am beginning to sound like a broken record or that I keep going around and around in a circle. Let me try to explain…I feel like the Lord has shown me only what is inches away from me…and the rest…well, my only choice is to trust him, to have faith that He is in control-- that his thoughts are so much higher than mine. Psalm 139:6 --“such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it.”

This is a trip full of purpose in both mine and Jenn’s hearts. We don’t know what the future holds for us. We do know the desires the Lord has put in our hearts and through this trip he is beginning to show us how these desires might be met.

We both want to travel. We both want to work with people, love on them, communicate to them, reach them with the love of Christ. We don’t know if that means missionaries, or if it means working in a business/corporation making money in order to give to the cause of missions or influence others. Maybe working for non-profits..? and funny how God has allowed us to go to Romania working along side a non-profit organization. (His Little Ones)

So its ok that we “cannot attain it”. That we don’t know exactly what the Lord is doing—we are just trying to follow him not knowing the destination
…

This trip has taught me a lot about humility. I am left on my knees. I can’t count the amount of times I have had to throw my hands up and realize that my finite mind, my stupid agenda, my selfish desire—it all crumbles when compared to Him.

His plan.

His glory.

How dare I throw at Him these things, whining that I don’t grasp what He is doing and then demand He show me exactly what he is doing--before I take the step he has already asked me to take…

Faith is hard. Not understanding is hard. Not seeing the big picture is hard. Trusting that the
Lord knows what he is doing, regardless of how I feel--- is hard.

But it is beautiful.

It is beautiful to see how the Lord gently pursues me, disciplines me, and refines me. He knows I get frustrated when I don’t “see” what is going on, He knows that makes me uncomfortable—
yet He has asked me to jump in every facet of my life.
.
.
.
Without knowing what is at the bottom

Without knowing when he is going to catch me

But having faith that in his timing-- He will.

So, here we are. Jenn and I are boarding a plan on December 27th at 10:30 p.m. God has handed us this amazing opportunity to go for two weeks, to immerse ourselves in a world so unlike ours, to see children who have nothing, to encourage the believers there who love them every day, to rip off the lenses that we have always looked at the world through and attempt to see it a different way.

We are carrying so many presents with us—this is going to be the best Christmas ever for these precious children! And I praise the Lord! He has chosen us to go and we are going to be the hands of Jesus. I pray that He fills us so much with His love. I pray it pours out of everything we do, and everywhere we go—so that whoever we are with will know Christ, that every time we hand a child a gift or give them a hug that the Lord will use it to show His love.

In the beginning I had such an internal struggle. Asking myself—why? You know when the devil whispers all those questions in your mind...I mean really, we are only going to be there for two weeks and what are we going to do? Hand out some presents…hold babies…say “Jesus loves you”. I just wrestled with seeing a suitable purpose…when I don’t see that 1+1=2 or in other words when I don’t see that what we are doing is going to produce something tangible, then I find myself thinking-- “we are kidding ourselves if we think we will make a difference.”

I hate feeling the pressures of this American Christianity—that if what I am “doing” doesn’t produce something visible/obvious then it doesn’t really mean anything. I hate that I feel compelled to come back and have a pretty wrapped up box of all the things God did that fits perfectly into “religion”.

Jenn and I read James 1:27 yesterday..."Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world."

..I have to get quiet..I have to get alone with Him, and then the voice of my Father is so much stronger, so steady. And I realize…my purpose is to know Him.

"You are My witnesses, says the Lord, and My servant whom I have chosen, that you may know Me, believe Me and remain steadfast to Me, and understand that I am He. Before Me there was no God formed, neither shall there be after Me. I, even I, am the Lord, and besides Me there is no Savior"--Isaiah 43:10-11

That’s what we are striving for.

To know him, to believe in him, to remain steadfast in Him, and to understand that He is the one and only God.

So this is just a life trip for us, a different phase in my relationship with the Lord…getting to know Him better

I don't want to be "stained" by this world, the American way of doing things, or the religion we have created... ..I have to get quiet..I have to get alone with Him, and then the voice of my Father is so much stronger, so steady.

This is echoed in Matthew’s gospel.."Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"
Jesus replied: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."—Matt. 22:36-4

My mom said everyday to me, "Love God and Love people, thats my calling"--she has inspired me

Please pray for me—that I will daily fall on my knees before our creator and realize that it is NOT about me—that even the desires he has placed in my heart are not about me. We live for a greater purpose…and ultimately I am to love Him and sacrifice to serve others.

I will cling to the words of Isaiah as we travel in only 12 days…knowing that whatever happens my love for Him has grown, my understanding of Him has grown, my faith in Him has grown and I am learning to love on other people—and regardless of what Jenn and I DO, that’s all that matters—we want to Be like Christ.

--emily

OVERWHELMED

2006-12-15T13:46:00.001-08:00

"Behold, I will bring to it health and healing, and I will heal them and reveal to them abundance of prosperity and security. 7I will restore the fortunes of Judah and the fortunes of Israel, and rebuild them as they were at first. 8I will cleanse them from all the guilt of their sin against me, and I will forgive all the guilt of their sin and rebellion against me. 9And this city shall be to Me a name of joy, a praise and a glory before all the nations of the earth who shall hear of all the good that I do for them. They shall fear and tremble because of all the good and all the prosperity I provide for it."

Jeremiah 33:6-9.
13 days. In 13 days Emily & I leave to go on this journey we have been waiting for! We just found out James, a man who works for google corp in WA, will be joining us for a few days. We are excited to see how God uses this team!

Yet, I'm overwhelmed. Now that finals are over -I have more time to process that I am actually going to RO !! Mom called today to tell me that more support had come in at the house. I'm overwhelmed. I'm overwhelmed at how the Lord has blessed this trip. I'm overwhelmed at the number of people that love me, love Emily and love Him enough to sacrifice for this trip.
Pray. Pray that Emily and I may be a name of joy in RO! Pray that we would bring praise and glory not to ourselves but to the One who orchestrates our lives! Pray that literally all the nations of the earth would come to know Him! Pray that through this trip not only would people in RO come to know God's grace & mercy but pray that people in America would too!
Thank you. Thank you for your support. Thank you for the gifts that enabled this trip to happen. Thank you for trusting God to give me wisdom as I seek to be a wise steward of what is not mine but yours!

Update #3

2006-12-15T13:45:00.000-08:00

!!Hola mis amigos y mi familia!!

I just finished a spanish oral examination so I'm still thinking inthat "lingo" :)

Can you believe that the trip is less than a month away! Ha - a few daysago, I was wearing shorts and today I am bundled up under three layers ofsweaters & jackets! Emily and I joke that God is starting to prep us forthe cold weather we will experience over there! We are getting excited!As far as updates go - I have a few cool stories to share with you!

Thelast email I think I asked you guys to be praying for a way to capture thefaces & emotions of all the kids we will be seeing over there - - - well,Emily and I have been praying for a camera for a while now - - She wenthome for thanksgiving and while she was there a married couple in her churchpulled her aside and said, "Emily - do you have a digital camera for yourtrip?" Emily had not yet told them of our desire to take lots of picturesand they just felt led to provide us with a camera!Emily & I also have a close friend who receives a monthly "income" from herdad - she said that this month she didn't need all that he had given her &wanted to give us any extra she did not used. Later she gave Emily 100$ toput toward our trip! What a huge blessing that is!

Today, Emily and I had "RO day." We met with a woman named Traci who wentto RO last summer & stayed with our professor's parents. She was able toshow us tons of pictures and give even more stories about what to expect/how to deal with cultural barriers etc. We received so much valuableinformation from her and definitley feel like we have a better grasp on whatit will be like.We also had lunch today with our professor and six students who took hisother COMM class. They did a project over His Little Ones and had createdtons of lesson plans, bible lessons and more for us to deliver! It was neatto see how many people truly are a part of this trip!The knitting club also has a few more things for us to get and we will bepicking those up soon!As far as prayers go - we NEED them.

Emily and I left today feeling a bitoverwhelemed. We realized that this trip is going to put our degrees (wellpotential degrees) to the test! Everything we have been learning abouthigh/low context cultures is completley 100% applicable! So:Pray that we will be able to be flexible, to be adaptable and to appreciatetheir "slower paced" culture. Pray we will have no ethnocentric bone in our body and that we will seek toUNDERSTAND where they are coming from instead of assuming our way isbetter.

Pray that communication between us and my professors' parents is clear,concise and not frustrating.Pray that the children would be calm and that they woudl respect us from dayone. Pray that discipline would not be an issue so that we can love themand have fun with them. Pray that God would ordain which children we get tospend time with.Pray that we get to go to the orphange often and that we would havediscernment on when to take breaks. Pray that we would take breaks and nottry to over do it because we "only" have 14 days.Pray that the support money we take over there would go a long way. Praythat we would be wise stewards of that money and would be able to blesseveryone and anyone who is in need!Pray that now as finals are ending we would be able to really focus and getready for this trip. Pray for a supernatural peace for our hearts and mindsand patience --- ohhh pray for patience :).

Thank you so much for all that you are doing. Know that we appreciate allof the emails, letters, support, and more!

Update #2

2006-12-15T13:43:00.000-08:00

Friends & Family
Time is flying and Emily & I will be leaving in but a few weeks! I have had a few BIG things happen recently and I wanted to share them with all ofyou!

A few ladies from Andrei’s church have a knitting club that meets on> Wednesdays. All semester they have been laboring to knit scarves, hats,> mittens, teddy bears and more for the children in RO. I went over there a> few weeks ago and walked in amazed. All over the chairs (pictureattached) were hand-crafted items for the children. I was overwhelmed at how I was> soon going to see the children rejoicing with these items on! However,not> only had they knitted the items – they had written personalized messagesto> every kid in one of the orphanages! Pray that as I am there – I maysomehow> someway capture their excitement in photographs to bring back to those> blessed women. I do not deserve to see the fruit/excitement of theirlabor –> but I am going to do my best to bring it back in photographs and written> memories!>> Also – you all have been so gracious to provide fresh ideas, provide> e-mail addresses of contacts in RO and people affiliated with it, etc. > Below is part of an e-mail I received this morning:> “The orphanages themselves were a unique experience I cannot describe. I> can> only suggest to you that you prepare the best you can for an emotional> response. How to do that, I am not really sure. ~wry smile~>> The best gift you can give the children is as much love, holding and> nurturing as possible. The lack of consistent care and touch in infancyhas> profound effects on the development of the children as they get older. If> you have time before you go, I recommend that you read about attachment> theory, and the conditions that result when a child does not have proper> nurturing, such as Reactive Attachment Disorder.”>>> That is our purpose. Many people have asked “What are you doing> Jenn?” “What is your purpose?” “What project are you accomplishing?” Our> purpose is that the children may be encouraged in heart and united inlove. > That they may see the love that Emily & I have for one another as sistersin> Christ and for them as children and that this love may turn their eyes to> Jesus – the Source of our love. This e-mail was a huge encouragement. Ido> not feel it is any coincidence that one of Emily & I’s professors adopteda> daughter who has Reactive Attachment Disorder. Before we even knew wewere> going to RO, I spent a while in his office asking questions about his> daughter. God’s incredible, isn’t He?>> Thank you for your support and prayers! As far as prayers go right> now – pray that we will be filled up with love in the coming days. Pray> that we will make wise, safe decisions while in RO. Pray that all of our> luggage will pass the weight limit and we won’t have to pay extra. Pray> that our parents would rest in God’s faithfulness to protect us. Pray for> boldness for us. >> Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I love you all!

Update #1

2006-12-15T13:42:00.000-08:00

Friends & Family,
Hi! I just wanted to send you an update on thehappenings with Romania! With tickets purchased and our lodging in place, we are ready to head off to Romania in a little over a month!!!

I wanted to “introduce” you to my traveling buddy! I met Emily this fall in Andrei’s class; however, we soon realized thatwe had not one, not two – but FOUR of the same classes! Needless to say, until now, our friendship has consisted mostly of 8am Starbucks study sessions and late night snacks while practicing Spanish!!

Emily & I are both extremely excited about what the Lord has instore for this trip. We both feel that our venture to Romania will not onlybe used to change the lives of orphan’s, but our lives as well. We areexcited to be stretched, grown, challenged, matured and molded!

A few weeks ago, Emily & I had the privilege of meeting with Addie, an aggie who went to Romania last summer with one of her close friends! She was able to give us priceless advice, answer questions, calm our nerves, suggest packing lists, give warnings, share her experiences and much more!

As the trip nears, I ask you to be in prayer over a few things. We are trying to come up with creative ideas to make/purchase for thechildren in Romania. If you have any ideas please let us know! Addie told usthe children love to color & write because in the orphanage they do not get mentally stimulated very often. We are planning to make a store run and purchase lots of Sketch books, crayons, markers and the like! The Lord has been so faithful to provide in every aspect and we are confident He has already gone before us & prepared the way! Thank you for taking time to read this update!

I will write again soon! -Jenn Crouse :)